Trying to find an explanation for an abusive partner’s behavior can be an exhausting task.It is natural to want to understand how someone we care deeply about, who says they care for us, is capable of saying and doing things to us that are hurtful or even dangerous.Once an abusive partner has broken down the victim’s ability to trust their own perceptions, the victim is more likely to stay in the abusive relationship.There are a variety of gaslighting techniques that an abusive partner might use: Withholding: the abusive partner pretends not to understand or refuses to listen. “I don’t want to hear this again,” or “You’re trying to confuse me.” Countering: the abusive partner questions the victim’s memory of events, even when the victim remembers them accurately. “You’re wrong, you never remember things correctly.” Blocking/Diverting: the abusive partner changes the subject and/or questions the victim’s thoughts. “Is that another crazy idea you got from [friend/family member]?Many of these labels are used loosely in the media we read and watch, and here on the lines, we hear them a lot.“Narcissist” is one of the more common terms we hear from callers and chatters about their abusive partners.” or “You’re imagining things.” Trivializing: the abusive partner makes the victim’s needs or feelings seem unimportant. “You’re going to get angry over a little thing like that?
It is an extremely effective form of emotional abuse that causes a victim to question their own feelings, instincts, and sanity, which gives the abusive partner a lot of power (and we know that abuse is about power and control).
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Find Life Over Coffee at Sound Cloud, i Tunes, Stitcher Radio, Website Podcast Question: I am hoping you can help me understand something. Over the past couple of years, I have felt a strong conviction to stop using spanking as a tool for discipline.
Does your partner repeatedly say things like this to you?
Do you often start questioning your own perception of reality, even your own sanity, within your relationship?
Having her pull your pants down and leaving you with them round your ankles for five humiliating minutes with your ridiculous little boner poking from under your shirt tails.
Head bowed, you await the order to lower yourself across her lap for your otk spanking.
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